all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
