she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
