We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize
