And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Randomize