That's intense
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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