it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Randomize
