You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
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