just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Randomize
