dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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