My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
