I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Farmville is her only friend.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Randomize
