whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
