Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
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