new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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