I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize
