turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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