Don't you send me to vm
We're facebook friends in real life
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
