i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Randomize