Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize