marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
