Rock
Scissors
Fuck
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Randomize
