I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
