did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
