No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
