I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Randomize
