Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I just want to make out with him forever
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
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