Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Randomize
