So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize
