We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
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