Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize