I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize