Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize