this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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