There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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