My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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