what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
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