So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Randomize
