? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Randomize
