Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Randomize
