I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Randomize
