oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize