id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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