Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Randomize
