We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
MIDGETS
????
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
