Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Randomize
