You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
