Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Randomize
