party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
