so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
