Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize