Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
We have so much sex to catch up on
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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